Do foreigners look ridiculous wearing kimono?

[bebemochi]

I'd really appreciate hearing peoples comments and opinions on this...
I just adore kimono. If I had my way I'd wear them all the time. I wish I had piles and piles of kimono for every occaision and season, I wish I had a whole collection of kimono from each historical period. I love down to earth striped hemp kimono and I love delicate silk yuzen kimono. In short I wish I really was 'Bebemochi'.
However although my husband is Japanese and I spend alot of time living with his family in Japan I never wear kimono in Japan because at the back of my mind I'm sure I'll look like a freak! Then again I dont wear them in England either, because I'm sure I'd look even wierder
So I put it to you:

DO foreigners inevitably look ridiculous wearing kimono???  

Where on earth, and on what occaisions do YOU wear kimono?
       

I'd be really interested to hear your experiences.
Bebemochi

[Kiyoaki]

Bebemochi,

I think the issue is more one of confidence rather than appearance.

The best answer that's possible, has to come from Liza Dalby. I mentioned her in the Bibliography section [Kimono addresses this issue directly]. She is a foreigner (in Japanese eyes), yet she learned to dress with aplomb and more stylishly than most Japanese women. It's not a question of genes, but one of confidence. It all comes down to training and practice (like most skills).

AndyZ, who also lives in England, had a similar question, so you may be interested to read our exchanges in the Guys section.

As to the question of when to wear them, the normal rules of dress apply here as in any other social situation. If the occasion is formal, then formal attire is appropriate. If casual ...... etc. If you need to find an occasion to wear them in public, try looking for Japanese cultural events to attend (especially if they relate to the arts). You're very likely to see others dress in kimono too.

If your question is, "Should I wear Japanese dress at all", only you can answer that. I think, if you have a passion for kimono, why not share it with others? Obviously, you're not alone in your appreciation. We're all proof, that you're not part of the lunatic fringe. If you need to build confidence, you can always start with perhaps just wearing the haori at work.

If you need to increase your confidence in wearing a kimono in public, then make a trial run in London. In a large cosmopolitan city, I can't imagine a woman wearing a kimono would cause a stir. If you need to test the waters at the beginning, make those first forays into neutral territory, before tryng it out closer to home.

Let us know how things progress.

Kiyoaki

[chiiyo]

It really really depends. Sometimes even native japanese look bad when wearing kimono. I recently bought a japanese "catalog" for kimono of sorts, and most of the women in there looked good in kimono, with two exceptions: The two foreigners, and one japanese. I think it was many because those two foreigners had brightly dyed hair and heavy makeup. There was simply something about them that disagreed with the kimono. But I have also seen pictures of foreigners wearing kimono, looking quite good. There is a photo of a western family wearing kimonos, in the gallery? They looked good. I guess if you really have the passion for it you don't really care whether you look weird or not.

As for the japanese who looked bad in kimono (and even made the kimono look bad), she had outrageous hair (dirty blond), very exaggerated expressions and very long fake nails. The problem, I think, was that she looked more comfortable in a pair of leopard print hot pants. So it really depends. You don't Have to be japanese to look good in kimono, it just so happens most of the japanese do look good in kimono, and many foreigners don't. Why don't you try and send us photos?

[LucBorgia]

   Dear Bebemochi:

   I too have often wondered the same thing!!  I live in a small town on the East Coast, where no one wears kimono at all.  Unlike the West Coast, many people here are not familiar with kimono, and tend to think of them as being something like a bath robe.    

   Plus, I don't look in the least bit Japanese -- I have blonde hair and blue eyes.  So I REALLY wonder if I look silly when I'm wearing a kimono!  

   I try and wear pieces that would be appropriate for my -- oh, how shall I put it -- social standing.  I'm single (ha ha!), so I wear a furisode instead of a tomosode and so forth.  I also feel a bit odd wearing a kimono with a mon.  It is a family crest and I don't want to offend by wearing the emblem of a family I don't belong to.

   I seldom have the opportunity to wear a kimono in the States.  Usually the only place I will wear one is at a Japanese anime convention.  There are all sorts of people in costume and one tends to blend into the crowd of monsters, mecha and Pokemon characters!  Everyone wants to take a picture of your kimono, so it is alot of fun.  

   I do wear haoris quite a bit with a black top and long black pants.  They make for a nice blazer, even if one gets stared at a bit oddly from time to time.  My colleagues at work are slowly becoming accustomed to my kimono wearing habit, and now they tend to ask, "What does this design mean?" or "How old is this piece?" rather than "What IS that you're wearing???"  

   I too wish I had more places to wear my kimonos...and a third hand to help me tie my obi!!    

[Kiyoaki]

Dear LucBorgia,

There are several schools of thought on wearing garments with 'mon'. The obvious point of departure is the traditional view. However, even if we were to strictly follow that rule, some Japanese would have a problem because they have no family crest.

In pre-Meiji Japan, only the samurai class used them. Even at the end of the Edo period, only some 2,600 crests were officially recognized (and many of these were cadet lines of 'daimyo' clans). Some of the 'chonin' were granted crests by the Shogun's government (as well as the right to wear a sword), but the majority were without. Many people didn't even have surnames.

In response, the enterprising urban class simply invented them. Actors in particular, created their own to put on costumes for samurai roles. Many of these became part of an actor's legacy when he passed his name and skills onto his descendant, but wearing them could only be justified while on stage.

Some of the great merchant houses did the same (think 'Mitsui', who originally started as a drapery/fabric business). This tradition continues even today, but modern attitudes have changed somewhat when it comes to ceremonial wear.

Because many Japanese cannot (or chose not to) afford custom made kimono, there is a thriving business in rented dress for weddings and other ceremonial occasions. [That's where most of the uchikake we see for sale originate.]

However, because formal wear requires a full set of five mon, these outfits have well-known crests already worked into the designs. Therefore, when hired out, a wedding couple will wear spurious mon on their outfits. Of course, this goes against tradition, but the younger generation doesn't seem to worry about it. Following their example, should we?

Obviously, for the ethnic non-Japanese, the issue is pointless, unless you want to be bound by traditions that simply don't apply to you. However, there are other cases to be considered. For instance, if you are married to a Japanese male that has a family crest, then it makes sense to wear his. It doesn't work the other way though.

My own case touches upon many of these areas. My father was ethnic Japanese, but my mother was a combination of Chinese, Irish, and Hawaiian. To complicate things, my paternal grandfather had changed the family name when he immigrated from Japan after 1900. This was a traditional act when someone embarked on a new course in their life. What was I to do when I ordered my first set of custom-made kimono?

I solved the issue by designing my own. But in a way that also avoided accidentally duplicating any existing design. So I consulted a reference work on mon __ then created something totally unknown.

Because of my Chinese and Japanese ancestry, I selected the 'kiku' (chrysanthemum) as the basic motif. However, I created a twist on the traditional design by dividing it into four parts (one for each ethnic contribution). I even custom ordered a stencil, to apply the resist that would reserve the mon design.

But you can take a plain kimono and raise its' level of fomality by adding a single embroidered mon between the shoulders. If none exist, then you're O.K. If one does exist, then your design has to cover up the original.

When all is said and done, only you can decide what is right. Let the traditonalists cast their unapproving gazes. If it weren't for the non-traditionalists, kimono-wearing would die out completely, for lack of propriety or become the reserve of the rich alone. Besides, what would we do if this second-hand market didn't exist?

All things considered, I'd encourage everyone to start (and continue) wearing their kimono, even if it means breaking a few 'rules'. Despite the fabled existence of the "fashion police", I've yet to hear them make a single arrest. ;D

Kiyoaki

[chiiyo]

Is it not true that kiku is reserved by the royal family of Japan? I know the royal family's mon is a flower, but I might be wrong about this.

[joval]

Re: where do you wear a kimono?

Well I think I will try to wear one to the next houseparty I am invited to. These events are usually informal but everyone tends to wear black outfits (females). So I am going to try a kimono but not a black formal one. I will tie a colourful piece of fabric around as a replacement obi as an experiment first. Later if all goes well I will attempt an obi tied correctly- after a bit of practice).
You know this tradition of wearing kimono is much like the Scots wearing a kilt.
If you have a surname that belongs to a clan then you can wear a kilt of the appropriate plaid or design. again formal or informal. However, today people who would like to wear a kilt can have one designed in their own colours.
The modern way to wear a kilt (male garment) has been adapted by females who wear a plaid skirt. No definite clan pattern is required.
Please excuse my typos! I tend to think as I type and get my grammar and spelling all wrong, you'd never think English is my first language.
Joval

[Kiyoaki]

Dear Joval,

Curious that you should mention the kilt tradition in regard to wearing "mon". I was musing about kilt wearing traditions when I was forming my response, because there are parallels in the development of both traditions that precede the current usage.

I understand, originally only the laird of the clan could wear the official tartan. Of course his household [i.e. blood relatives and servants] appropriated it as a mark of allegiance, and from there it spread to non-household people, who may have been subject to the laird.

From there, the tradition evolved to the point where people with a maternal grandmother, who carries the clan name, can properly wear their clan tartan. Nowdays, people almost pick and choose according to what colors they like, which is a far cry from any of these traditions.

My maternal grandmother's name was "Rowan". I can't tell whether her father was Irish or Scots, but I do know the family name goes back to William the Conqueror, and was originally "Roland".

However, there is no official tartan for that name, although some of the more recent, and non-traditional ones of the 19th cenutry are too much in evidence. Many of them were simply invented to meet the popular demand for Scottish connections. [Think of the writer Walter Scott!]

Instead, I blundered on trying to locate a regional tartan instead. Eventually, I came up with an obscure one called "Murray of Tullabardine", which I've adopted as my official tartan.

I then proceeded to have a 'great plaid' [the ancestor to the modern kilt] made out of a length of Scottish wool. How's that for a multi-national inflection on wearing kimonos?

Kiyoaki

[joval]

Hi Kyoaki

What a rich and varied ancestry you have. I have looked up rowan and found a blue & green plaid, quite bright which suggests a modern one.
You know that William the Conquerer has a lot to answer for.He introduced so many Norman knights into Britain and gave them parcels of property after dispossessing the Saxons. So practically all Brits are related in some way to a Norman name, but that is civilisation. We are all culturally mixed and what a fascinating time can be had by researching all the traditions.
As I have much Scots ancestry in the family we would be able to wear kilts, unfortunately no-one seems too keen to walk around with bare knees! Much too cold here and snowing today.
Thanks for the info on motifs....my study continues, and thanks to Jenn for the input. most welcome.
Joval

[Kiyoaki]

Joval,

I assume you live in Great Britain. I hesitate to name any particular country for fear of offending your political sensibilities if you're Scots, Irish, Welsh, Cornish, Manx or other.

In addition to the Norman influence (and before them) there were the Celts, then Saxons, Friesians, Danes and Vikings. After the Normans came the Dutch and the Germans. I hardly think there is such a thing as the English race, let alone English surnames.

I guess we have strayed far a field from wearing the kimono.

Kiyoaki

[Kiyoaki]

Cyber-Hippy,

The mon used by the Imperial household in a 16-petal, double chrysanthemum, with a center proportion of 1/8 the overall diameter (more or less). That is the official one. .

However, many other families have used it in various forms. Often it is halved, and water rills fill the lower half. Sometimes, the reverse side is shown with the sepal replacing the stamens. Other times, there are leaves that border the flower, and still other times blossom halves are used to form the border of the mon itself.

I designed a 24-petaled 'mon'. As I recall, my age at the time was 24, which helped to decide the number, which had to be divisable by four. The proportion didn't look as cramped and awkward as 28, or 32, and 20 looked to crude, so I settled on 24. I also did not double the form, to avoid infringing upon Imperial tradition.

Does that help to clear things up?

Kiyoaki

[chiiyo]

Yes, that explains things a bit, but I was told by my japanese friend that kiku is the imperial mon and that only when you are allowed by the imperial family, then are you to use certain versions/varieties of the kiku mon.

I learned this because his family mon was one of the many types of kiku mons. I am not too sure about this, so I thought maybe I'll clear it up. Wasn't the usage of mons about the same as surnames, in that common families did not have them, and only had them later on when a daimyo or shogun presents to them the honour? If that is the case, wouldn't all kiku mons be descendants of the original imperial mon?

[Kiyoaki]

Dear CH,

What you say is largely true, but if we put things into a larger perspective, then the answer is more complicated than what you've been told.

The "kuge" (court nobility) never really used 'mon' as we understand them. They did decorate their household goods with certain motifs that they favored, but not in the systematic ways that the "bushi" developed from the Kamakura period forward. If you look at Heian period furnishing, you would be hard put to find any recognizable crests. Medallions certainly, but not mon in our current sense of the word.

Even during the time of the Gempei Wars (Heike vs. Genji), each opposing side used only one emblem to identify their multiple lineages. The "cho" (butterfly) stood for the Heike (Taira); while the "sasa-rindo" (bamboo leaves and gentian flower) represented the Genji (Minamoto) clans [plural]. There was no differentiation by family name because the number of clans was very limited [perhaps a few dozen].

By the time of the Kamakura shoguns, we see crests in general use by the bushi. In fact the earliest ones date from this time and some of those survive until today. The kuge, and the Emperor however, still did not use mon. Their court  attire, even today, shows no sign of it.

What you say about confering crests is true for the samurai, but that was not a court tradition. There was a universal tradition that certain design motifs [i.e. kiku and kiri] were reserved for the Emperor's household, and 'yes' they could be permitted for use by temples and other institutions, but not individuals as a rule. The only exception that can be documented is Toyotomi Hideyoshi, who was granted the use of the kiri (pawlonia) motif when he was made "Kampaku".

The development of the kiku-mon began late in the Kamakura period. During the time of the Hojo Regency, minor [i.e. boy] imperial princes were selected to head the "bakufu". These princes created the first kiku-mon, by converting the chrysanthemum motif into a formal mon. When they gave up their court status, they adopted the bushi tradition wholesale. Their descendants then inherited that crest, and they in turn gave rise to new lineages that multiplied them.

The form of the Imperial household crest was codified at the beginning of the Meiji period. By then, the bushi practice had become ingrained with the larger society. Perhaps the lack of a mon for the Emperor was seen as a loss of dignity. In any event, one was created to fill the gap. It was also at this time that the kiri was stipulated as the Empress' household mon.

As we now see, your information is largely correct as far as recent tradition goes, but that tradition is only 120 years old. In reality, all the various mon that feature the chrysanthemum were created before the modern double chrysanthemum and pawlonia crests came into use.

If we next applied the genealogical underpinnings that justify the use of crests in Japan, then few would be elligible to wear their avowed mon. Many are entitled. The problem though, is to determine, which is their "correct" one.

In the West, geneaology has always been based upon blood. However, the Japanese have always allowed adoption to trump blood descent.  Because of this legalism, few families can claim an unbroken bloodline back to the founder of their clan. Even the Emperor cannot claim a true genetic kinship with the earliest historical Tenno.

If the genetic principle were strictly applied, we would realize, the blood of the emperors for the past two millenia has not been conserved, but combined with that of the general populace.  The siblings of an adopted emperor are his closest genetic twins. When they have children they also bequeathed his genes to the next generation (and so on down to the present one). By now, those genes have touched every layer of Japanese society. In lieu of this circumstance, anyone would be justified in claiming use of kiku-mon.

Based upon that perspective, I don't think an act of lese majeste' has been comitted. I'm certain many Japanese would disagree, and I don't supposed I've made many converts here either. I hope I've at least demonstrated, my choice wasn't a frivolous one.

Kiyoaki <br>

[chiiyo]

Thank you. That was indeed educational, and cleared up a lot. Although I think we might have diverged from the orginal topic a bit too much...

[Hoshi]

...and I'll try to put it back on topic.

I'm blonde and somewhat German, so it looks really wierd for me to be in a kimono. Plus, I have almost no where to wear them (I live in Arkansas, go figure).

It'd fun to wear it at a band concert. Since I play the flute, the sleeves would always be up. Spiffy =D

[Kou Hiko]

I am also blonde and I wear kimono. But I don't really think it is the color of my hair that makes me look "strange" in kimono (it's in parenthasis because I don't feel I look strange). I've seen the Japanese version of Barbie dolls (Takara Jenny I think she's called ) and alot of the time she has blonde hair.

I think it is actually the color of our skin. Americans (and Europeans) have very white and pink skin. I, for example, am very white/pink. I have absolutly no tan. Japanese look so good in kimono because they have olive colored skin.

I think a good way to get past that, if you're self conscious of looking weird in kimono, is to find what color kimono looks best on you. I personally don't mind, I'll wear anything. But I have found that I like reds and pinks. Black is also good. I would not recommend tan if you're trying to find your color, though. I have one and I love it, but it is supposed to match a Japanese person's skin tone. Purple also goes good with Japanese skin tone.

My personal opinion (like you've all heard before) is wear it. No matter what. People don't look at the stains or fact that you're a gaijin (foreigner). They look at the fact that you ARE wearing kimono and that you KNOW how to wear kimono (and that you can tell the difference between an obi and a table runner.

[Fujitsubo]

Anyone can look ridiculous in kimono if they try.  I was sitting in a taxi at a busy corner in Harajuku last spring and was very surprised to see two teenaged girls wearing yukata.  They had the bleached, fuzzy hair, blue eyelids and frosted pink lipstick but I was impressed that they were at least trying to wear traditional Japanese garments.  I thought their parents must be proud.  That is - until the taxi next to me moved.  These two young girls had cut the yukata to micro-mini skirt length and were wearing the gravity defying platform shoes that have been outlawed when you are driving in Japan.  I can't imagine their parents allowing them to leave the house dressed like that so I am sure - as many teenagers do - they probably brought their costumes and got changed when they got to the very popular corner.  (Every weekend, there is also an Elvis Fest at this same corner.)  But then again, this was the same weekend I saw a young man with bright pink hair on the subway wearing a kilt, ski boots, and a black leather jacket with one sleeve missing.  I suppose anyone can look ridiculous wearing anything if they try.    

[chiiyo]

Funny you should say that, because I believe the the micro-mini skirt yukata is actually recognised, and is meant to promote use of kimono? The idea of making kimono more popular? But of course, I think I woudl prefer Akihito's way much better than actually changing the kimono to make it more appealing...

[Calendarbay]

Greetings Everyone,

First let me say that I enjoy reading all of your posts on this fascinating subject.  I find this particular topic interesting, because last summer my daughter and I were very fortunate to go to Onoe-machi in Aomori-ken for our middle school student exchange.  One of the highlights was "kimono day" when we were all dressed by several very patient and skilled sensei, and for the girls it included new hairstyles and makeup as well.

After the transformation, without exception everyone looked absolutely incredible, with some going through a bit of a change in demeanor as well.  Having seen this firsthand, I don't think it really matters what nationality resides inside the kimono.  It does perhaps have more to do with an understanding of proper technique, fashion sense of knowing you may be pushing the envelope of acceptablity by mixing things which don't go together, including yourself, and attitude of the person.  It was of course, perfectly imaginable that we would be wearing kimono in Japan.  Doing so back home, on the other hand, is very much out of the ordinary, so that a person probably has to have the mental capacity to do it regardless of what anyone else thinks about it.

With the limitless range of fabrics, colors and designs of kimono, it's hard to imagine it would be impossible to find a match for each individual.  My daughter's sensei spent half an hour dressing her, and then decided the color wasn't right, and started over with another.

Feeling comfortable wearing them is just as much part of whether you look acceptable, because it probably shows if you're not.  So except for those pesky people who seem to look good no matter what they wear, it's probably a good idea to approach this with a degree of awareness of what you're doing, which thankfully has a long history in Japan to draw from.  If a person can do that with a certain amount of dignity, anyone ought to be able to look good.  We may not be accustomed to seeing it, which may make it seem odd, but that's certainly no reason not to do it.  If you look as good as our kids did, you'll probably be the object of admiration rather than having a feeling of being out of place.

If anyone can tell me how to insert pictures (Akihito?), I'll show you what I mean.

[Kou Hiko]

I feel very comfortable wearing kimono in America. You do get stares and interesting looks, but it's mostly possitive. I've never hear or seen someone snicker, laugh, or raise an eyebrow and say "what the h@*# is she wearing?!".  Mostly everyone just looks and walks by like it's nothing (maybe because they don't want to be rude by staring) or they stop with big smiles and say things like "Ooohhh! It's sooo pretty!!" "It's so soft!" "It must take for ever to put on." and Japanese people usually say "Who dressed you?" (I dress myself) "Not even I can put on kimono." or "Oh, you're so talented."
But this has just been my experience.

The worst response that I got was when I was at the mall getting my picture taken, some teenage boys (the one's with the pants off their butts, you know) came up to me and asked if I was a dancer and when and where I'd be performing.

I too find problems with color on my (my tan kimono doesn't go with my skin color) but I don't let it bother me, only some kimono experts would care. I met a renouned Japanese dancer/instructor who gives kimono dressing lessons, teaches kabuki dance and makeup, and shamisen lessons, and she didn't even mention the color of the tan kimono when we talked about me learning to dress on my own. It depends on the person.

(I too would like to know how to insert pictures. I have pictures of myself that I don't mind showing off.)